By my rough calculations, approximately 84% of all blogs that have a leadership bent have in the last month posted about the benefit of making New Years resolutions.
The problem I’ve often found with making a long list of things to achieve is by Easter I’ve ticked off a grand total of zero items, my motivation wanes, and the only time I look at the list thereafter is when I stumble across it years later. Continue reading New Year ‘non’-Resolutions
If you follow this blog, you’ll hear me mention three people on a regular basis. Ryan Holiday, Tim Ferriss and Jocko Willink. I credit them as the majority shareholders in my recent learning investment portfolio. They themselves are prolific in their teachings, and I recommend you read and listen to them all as much as possible. Along with the resources they recommend, they form a 3-person Advisory Council that’s hard to beat. I must note that I’ve never met any of them – although I did once get a Facebook response from Jocko – but reading their books and listening to their podcasts has been as good a schooling as you’ll get anywhere, and I’m thinking of making a trip to Jocko’s Musterin 2019. Side note: Ant, I’ll be crashing at your joint so get that air bed pumped up.
Today’s post is a review of Ryan Holiday’s book The Obstacle is the Way. For reasons unknown, I read the first 3 chapters of the book back in early 2017, and it then sat on my shelf for almost a year. Why? It wasn’t boring or poorly written. I suspect it was because I wasn’t really ready to absorb the message it spruiked on the dust jacket and those early chapters, and I was possibly a little apprehensive, or maybe even blinded by my ego that the lessons would even apply to me.
“It’s impossible for a man to learn what he thinks he already knows” – Epectitus
For reasons even further unknown, I picked it up again recently and simply devoured it. Perhaps I was ready for what he had to say, perhaps I needed to hear what he had to say, but regardless of the reason, it’s certainly made an impact.
The book is set out similarly to his others (Ego is the Enemy, The Daily Stoic – both are highly recommended), in that it looks to break down huge, mind-bending concepts into tasty bite-sized pieces. Similar I’m told, to the way you should eat an elephant. These tasty brain nuggets make the concepts infinitely easier to retain and even more importantly, easier to implement.
So what are these concepts, these principles?
Holiday doesn’t just look to, but succeeds in, cleverly detailing a personal operating system to help you perceive, act and persevere in the face of obstacles. I write that, but actually it’s more – it’s providing a way to entirely refocus your approach to obstacles, great and small. Redefining them in your head so that they no longer appear as obstacles, but opportunities for growth, learning and improvement.
He does this by providing a way to visualise obstacles in the same way Stoicism teaches an approach to life. Three basic principles.
Perception – See things for what they are.
Action – Do what we can.
Will – Endure and bear what we must.
Fundamentally, these principles, or maxims, are what have guided the Stoics for centuries. From the teachings of Seneca, Marcus Aurelius and beyond, Stoicism provides us a framework for re-configuring our perspective on life, with the ultimate aim of a simpler life. Simpler doesn’t necessarily mean living like a pauper or foregoing pleasure, but that whichever path you choose is chosen for sound reason. Apart from the seemingly obvious benefit of this, it then ultimately provides you with more time and focus on doing what it is you need to do in this life.
I’ll be sharing a post in the coming weeks on how reading and learning, and practising Stoicism has had a huge impact on my life, but for now you might be asking “What does any of this have to do with leadership?”
I’ll be honest, it’s hard to provide a specific answer to this. If I could, it would have been be me that would have written the book.
What I can tell you is that since trying to implement the fundamentals Holiday writes of, I’ve noticed that what would have previously pi$$ed me off for hours or even days, seems to have shrunk to minutes, or not at all. Is it because I’m older, wiser (ha!), or maybe it’s having two kids who are growing up too fast? Do all these things mean I’ve mellowed with age?
Perhaps. I’m not saying I’ve reached a Zen-level calmness, far from it, but with the stresses and obligations more pronounced than ever before, you’d think this would be offset by any mellowing and I’d still be pi$$ed off. I truly believe that the combination of Stoicism and the teachings of this book have made me a better father, better leader, and a better human.
Yeah right, I hear you mutter under your breath. Check out this sucker caught up in yet another self-help cult. I understand your scepticism. I felt it myself before I started learning again. Just read the book and you’ll see what I mean.
Holiday’s fundamental principle is that the obstacle you face, whatever it might be, is unlikely to go away simply because you want it to. You stub your toe on a table. You then shout at the table, and while you’re at it, you shout at your toe. Neither of these are going to upset the table, nor you toe for that matter. You stub your toe on the table and then take a chainsaw to the table. This is also not going to upset the table. I recommend not taking a chainsaw to your toe. The table is a simple example, but illustrates the point. It is your response to an obstacle which causes the reaction, not the actual obstacle itself. More importantly, it is only your response to an external stimulus that you are able to control.
He’s mindful of not wanting to sound glib, which is difficult when you consider some of the obstacles people face every day. A sudden and unexpected death of a loved one? Hard to see how that’s a good thing, and while grieving is a natural response, Holiday’s approach is to limit the impact that that grieving has on your life, by understanding that there’s nothing you can do to change what happened, and that being paralysed by that grief serves no one. To take it to the next level, the person that’s dead doesn’t care at all.
On a lighter note, the approach can be applied to your work (and home) life almost every day. I’ve stolen from Jocko Willink a method of changing your perspective, whose standard response to members of his SEAL team when things didn’t go as planned was “Good!”
Good! – Jocko Willink (when something went wrong)
Same approach as Holiday describes, but provides a tactical method that you can implement today.
Ammunition re-supply didn’t arrive?
Good! Opportunity for us to practise hand-to-hand combat.
Our operation got cancelled? Good! Opportunity for us to run through the plan a few more times.
Now unless you’re in a combat zone, these may not seem particularly relevant, but in our normal, ‘not being shot at’, lives, the approach still works.
Got a boss that micro-manages you?
Good! Now’s your opportunity to work on methods in dealing with this type of person.
Got looked over for that promotion?
Good! More time to get better.
Good! Now there’s more time to spend with your family who you’ve ignored recently.
“If you can say the word Good! Guess what? It means you’re still alive. It means you’re still breathing. And if you’re still breathing, guess what? You’ve still got fight in you. So get up. Dust off. Reload. Recalibrate. Re-engage.
And go out on the attack.” – Jocko Willink
Your response to the obstacle is the only thing you can control. Re-visualise it and see it as an opportunity to learn, to grow, to develop, and you’ll suddenly find that everything is a lesson in leadership. Even the hard sh!t, in fact, especially the hard sh!t. It’s an uplifting revelation to have.
Obstacles in whichever form they take, are a vast majority of the time, not placed in your way deliberately, or with malice. Obstacles are life’s way of reminding you that you’re alive, and that while you think you may have mastered her, that Mother Nature still runs this show so and you’re really just a passenger. Each time you conquer an obstacle, you’ll learn something. Each time, you’ll develop strength, wisdom and perspective. Each time, a little more of the competition falls away. Until all that is left is you: the best version of you.
“Lose money?” Remember, you could have lost a friend. “Lost that job?” What if you’d lost a limb?
“Lost your house?”
You could have lost everything.
So we’ve covered off Perception and we’re already at 1,600 words. There’s enough meat on this bone to warrant more posts, so we’ll stick with just Perception today and cover off Action and Will in a few weeks.
Of all the stories in the book about Perception, the one that stuck most in my mind, and the one I’ve reflected on the most, is a story about a factory fire at Thomas Edison’s laboratory which destroyed almost all of his life’s work.
Now it’s statistically unlikely that any of us will ever reach the heady heights of Edison, but if he can approach the razing of his factory as a spectacle to behold, who told his son with childlike excitement as the fire raged, fuelled by the strange chemicals in the various buildings, “Go get your mother and all of her friends. They’ll never see a fire like this again”, and calmly state afterwards, “It’s alright. We’ve just got rid of a lot of rubbish”, we can surely re-frame having a difficult boss or poor Wi-Fi reception as an opportunity.
Side note: Edison’s factory was up and running again in weeks, at full production some 3 months later, and almost tripled its output and profit within a year.
Make no mistake. It’s hard work trying to implement the approaches outlined in the book. It’s easy to see every obstacle as another reason to rest. Another reason that explains why the other guy is succeeding when you’re not. Another reason to give up.
But that’s the exact reason why you should try. Why you must try.
The only person you should try and be better than…..
is the person you were yesterday
I promise you that you only need to do this exercise a few times to see the benefit. But I promise you will, as the effect is immediate.
The impediment to action advances action. What stands in the way becomes the way. – Marcus Aurileus
As I promised in my first book review, I’m happy to send through a copy of my index in Excel format. Leave a comment below, or get in touch via the Contact page.
As also as promised, my 3 takeaways;
Edison’s factory fire – everything is an opportunity if you’re open to it.
Changing your perspective on obstacles being opportunities is difficult and takes time. Worth the effort though.
A quote from Amelia Earhart “Always think with your stick forward”. That is, you can’t ever let up your flying speed – if you do, you crash. Be deliberate, of course, but you always need to be moving forward.
Re-framing my relationship with obstacles, and making it part of my existence, is I suspect, going to be something I’ll have to work on for the rest of my life. But in the short time I’ve been trying to implement it, I’ve learned a lot.
In my recent post, I reviewed one of the best leadership books I’ve read in quite some time. Hal Moore on Leadership: Winning when out gunned and out manned is a no-nonsense record of one man’s leadership lessons learned over 30+ years in the US Army. Buy it – it’s worth it.
Throughout the book, Moore speaks of confidence, and that there are four foundational tenets.
Confidence in your weapon (or your tools, resources, systems if not in a combat environment)
Confidence in your team
Confidence in your leader(s)
He doesn’t go into too much detail in analysing these specifically, and while the genesis of his thoughts rest firmly in the military construct, he notes there’s an obvious correlation to business and life in general as well.
It got me to thinking if confidence could be mapped. Could you represent these four pillars and understand what having one and not another might mean, or if two or three overlapped? Similar to this really effective representation of the Japanese term ikigai (which might get its own post in the coming months).
If you’re interested, I think I sit in the ‘Satisfaction, but feeling of uselessness‘ bracket.
I sketched a few ideas and as you can see below, it’s unlikely I’ll be making a career change to mathematician or graphic designer any time soon.
What became painfully clear was making a 4-variable infographic with any real meaning was harder than it appears. Drawing 4 intersecting circles wasn’t the problem, but it was determining a meaningful analysis of where the circles intersected that proved difficult.
As I worked through sketching out a few failures (ideas), more and more of them started to look like charts rather than images representing a concept. I got to wondering if you could have a team with a perfect four-way balance of confidence? Is it something you could assess and then improve on? What would it mean if you did get a top-score confidence index (CI)? Confidence Index – remember that. You heard it here first.
I took to Google Scholar (an amazing resource that gives you search results from academic sources) to investigate if this has been done before. There are thousands of hits on measuring team morale, and the effect self-confidence has on individual and team results, but nothing popped out trying to map these 4 specific factors.
Now we’ve all likely been subjected to these kind of assessments at work before – usually around Safety Culture. Each time I’ve sat these assessments and been presented with the results, there’s great hype and excitement about how the results will drive change in the organisation or team. I’d say of all the examples I’ve seen over the last 18 years, organisations are running at a less than 25% strike rate with regards to any real, tangible change. Would this new CI assessment change that? Of course not – it’s rarely the assessment or the analysis of the results that determines if action will be taken, or if it will be effective. It’s the will and commitment of the Senior Leadership Team (SLT) that does. The CI assessment would just identify which areas the team think are strong and which are weak, and allows the SLT and Executives to then target their effort and resources.
Being an effective executive is an entire topic on its own which we won’t cover today, but for those who are executives, or are hoping to become one, take a look at a book called The Effective Executive by Peter Drucker. Written in 1966, it’s style is a little dated, but the lessons are as solid as they come.
I digress. The Confidence Index (again, you heard it here first).
I’m not proposing to try and create a full assessment tool in this post – while I’m particularly interested in seeing what comes of it, I’m fairly certain I don’t have the necessary horsepower to make it into an effective tool on my own. I’m going to ask all of YOU if there’s anyone who is interested in being part of a team to develop this, get in touch or leave a comment below.
I’ve set a target of 6 months to get this thing developed, tested, and to then report back. Broad plan is as follows;
Draft assessment questions
Undertake ‘market research’
Finalise set of questions
Run preliminary assessments
Determine most effective measure of results
6 months seems to be a reasonable time frame for this in amongst all the normal work / life pressures. I think most of the time will be spent working out what questions to ask in each of the four areas that would result in a meaningful ‘score’, and then finding someone who is an Excel wizard to help with presenting the data.
If you have any great examples or resources that might assist, feel free to get in touch via the Contact Us page and drop me a line. A problem shared is a problem halved.
Do you think the Confidence Index would benefit you and your team? Do you think it’s just another management tool that has no real-world value? What are your experiences with these types of assessments – do you have examples of where real change has been made as a result of one? Would you like to be part of the team that develops the Confidence Index?
As always, either get in touch via the Contact Us page, or leave a comment below.
As I re-kindled my obsession with reading a few years ago, I discovered that after devouring a great book and learning a bunch, my goldfish-like memory failed me. Other than the title of the book, or perhaps the colour of the front cover, I retained almost none of the learnings. I’d lost all the nuggets in the sluice water. Enter Tim Ferriss, his advice on indexing, and sticky tabs. Mine is a simple process, and comes down to a few quick steps.